Some of you may not want to read this becasue you are in a bad infertility place right now. Others might not want to read this becasue it's long and boring. You've been warned.
I have been mum on my pregnancy. I have been reluctant to post much for many reasons. At first it was a lot take in and I was deep in the throws of 1st trimester symptoms. I was dealing with some emotional issues related to DE (which will become it's own post). I have the usual level of guilt many former infertiles have and am careful not to go on and on about how super-awesome it is to be pregnant. Don't get me wrong...it is super-awesome but I always felt a bit ...miffed... when former interfiles get pregnant and completely forget what it's like still be in the trenches. I think everyone can and should glow but I do want to have a certain amount of sensitivity. It's a hard line to find but I read many blogs that have done just that (been happy about their pregnancy but maintained a certain sensitivity). Other times I feel hurt (even thought I am pregnant) or annoyed by what can come across as carelessness. I fear coming across that way.
That being said here is my update.
I am 25 weeks as you can tell from my widget. Everything looks great. Other than the time I had a stuck uterus everything is textbook and healthy. As of today I am at a 16 lb weight-gain which is exactly what I should be. Baby is kicking all the time. I feel bigger than last time around but I think that's normal for a second pregnancy.
All tests on baby look fine. Since the donor was 27 at the time of transfer and all screening test have come back in normal ranges I did not do an amnio. If we were using my old eggs I would certainly have done one but for this pregnancy it I didn't think it was neccessary. Plus amnios are scary and painful. Overall I'm just a lot less stressed about this pregnancy than I was the first time. Again, I think that is standard with a 2nd pregnancy. Plus having a younger, healthy egg helps my anxiety level.
At the level 2 u/s everything measured healthy. All parts of baby and me are on track and accounted for. Baby didn't not cooperate so we do not know the sex. The tech said he thought it is probably a girl so we'll go with that. I would like to know with more certainty but an eductaed guess is good enough for me. Besides, all I really wanted to know from that test is that baby has a brain and that it's kidneys are on the inside. Not that I want to be surprised...I like to plan, pick out a name, bond...but I can do all that with a 75% chance. I could pay for another u/s but 1) I don't want to spend the money 2) I'm not in love with doing medically unnecessary tests. So we'll just go with the assumption that she is a she.
I am thrilled either way. I had no preference about sex going into this. A girl is easier since we have all the stuff. If it turns out to be a boy...he'll have to wear some pink at first. No big deal. Actually with Piccolina I bought mostly gender neutral stuff anyhow so it will all work. Plus it gives me more lobbying room to get Mr. Peeveme to agree to #3. I would like to try for a boy (even though 3 girls sounds pretty awesome too). He's dead-set against a #3. Even though he agreed last year to a #3 and we have 7 blasts on ice. We'll cross that bridge when we come to it.
No preparations have begun for this baby. Really. Nothing. I figure I have everything I need. It's just a matter of getting it out of the garage and assembling it. The most time consuming thing I will have to do is get all the clothes out of their storage bags and wash them and rearrange the kids drawers and closet to accommodate two sets of clothes. (Two sets of clothes...I could pinch myself)
With this pregnancy I seem to be a lot more tired. I remember having more energy last time. I have 3 explanations 1) I am 3 years older 2) I have a toddler 3) I am not able to take care of myself like I did the last time (see reason #2). I am also having some issues with incontinence (again, normal 2nd pregnancy stuff). Every time I laugh I pee a little which, in turn, make me laugh even harder becasue I think it's funny....it's a vicious and damp cycle.
Since I am at the point of viability I did contact my doula. I would really like to go unmendicated again and without her I would not have made it through an unmediated-induced labor. She's open during our due date! So I need to read my book and start doing my Kegels which should also help with that little incontinence problem I mentioned.
Ok so that's about it. We are healthy and on track. Baby is probably a girl. Have done nothing to prepare but I don't really need to yet. One or two trips to BabiesRus and and weekend of washing and folding should do it. I'm only 25 weeks so as long as things continue on this healthy path I have lots of time. I say that now....once that nesting energy kicks in I will probably have all that nervous energy and freak myself out. The biggest thing I have to do is prepare myself for unmedicated labor: read, make that mental commitment, meet with my doula.
When people ask me how I am doing I tell them great. Everything is just great...becasue it is. Of course, I have the normal pregnancy issues (so tired, uncomfortable, stressed, heartburn) but really it's wonderful to have all those inconveniences.
They way I describe it to folks is: "I am stupid-happy morning, noon and night".