I lie about my age but not in the way most women do. I make myself older. Here's why. I'm 38. If I tell people I'm 29 then they may think I look a bit rough for a 29 year-old. But if I say I'm 40 then they all think I look GREAT! I'd rather people think I look young for my age than old for my age.
I try not to get too caught up in the youth worship. I think every age has it's draw backs and perks and purposes. My 20's were all about accomplishment and identity. My 30's have been about building career and family. I have spent to past 20 yeas just working my ass off trying to create the necessary circumstances for a good life as I define it (satisfying career, good marriage, children, community, culture). In my 40's I hope I can start to enjoy the fruits of all that work. I don't think I am "done" working on career, marriage, family, community and culture but the foundations have been laid. It's time I started to enjoy my life instead of just trying to build my life.
I want my 40's to be about reflection, correction, recreation and fruition. Where have I been? Am I happy with where I am and where I am going? What do I need to change? Am I taking the time to enjoy all that I have? How can I have more fun? I still have a year or so before I'm actually in my 40's but I take a while to come around and change gears.
I'm someone who gets caught up in the details and to-do lists. I run on stress and anxiety. My parents ran on stress and anxiety and while that has certainly gotten me pretty far in life I don't have much fun. I never rest or enjoy life. I just work. I always feel like I am behind where I could be or should be. My house isn't clean enough, my resume doesn't have enough honors, I should gain this or that skill set, I should have had three kids by now. I do love learning, accomplishment and being challenged but I'm always striving; never satisfied. I tell myself that accomplishment = happiness. And while it's certainly satisfying it's not happiness. Perhaps I have been lying to myself. Maybe with increased maturity I can be a little softer. I can be a little kinder to myself and others.
Fun and enjoyment do not come naturally to me. Recreation and begin social actually make me uncomfortable. Funny, out of all my accomplishments in life having fun and enjoying myself may be my biggest challenge.
All you fun and social people out there...how do you do it? What are your secrets? How do you find the time? Is is just natural and can't be learned?
How do you "enjoy" your life. Is it just a state of mind? Am I over thinking this?
And the next time you are asked your age add on a few years and let people tell you how great you look. I promise, it feels nice.