Friday, May 22, 2015

We have a draft contract

OK, I don't expect that anyone is reading this as it happens but perhaps some day in the future someone will stumble onto this and it will help.

Well it's good to have a lawyer in the bunch because Intended Mother has whipped up a contract.  Since the law is so ill-defined it has pretty strong language and repetitive language but that is to protect everyone.  Certainly they do not want us to have any claim to the intended children and we don't want to have any responsibilities.

I guess Mr. Peeveme and I will sit down when we have the time. Then we go back and forth with the Intended Parents on the contract language. Once we think we have it settled we'll both send this to our lawyers (Note to self:contact a lawyer).

Both couples need to see a therapist.  There maybe a few more hoops but essentially, once we sign the contract and clinic has what it needs to move forward it will be a done deal.  Pretty straight forward.

What is not straight forward in the emotional part.    I want this to donation to happen and I am very excited for the Intended Parents but I am still a little sad.  I really wanted more babies.  I wanted to be pregnant again. I wanted to breastfeed again. I know that wont happen and I am sad but accepting of that.  I want these excellent embryos to become awesome humans...just like Bambina.  I feel loss that I wont be able to see them. I don't want to mother them...I just want to know them.  I understand that it is probably is best for all involved to have some distance.  I know that.  But I still want.  At least it is a want and not a need.  Wants are easier to ignore.  What I don't want to ignore is if Bambina feels she needs to see the Intended Children.  Not sure how you write that into a contract.  I don't think you  can.

Until now I thought that seeing the therapist was just something to check off on the 'ol to-do list. Now I think I might have something I need to discuss.


areyoukiddingme said...

Maybe you could leave the door open for contact while still protecting everyone. I'm sure there's a way, but if the intended parents are skittish about contact, it will be difficult to hash out. Therapy is probably in order! Good luck - it's difficult to manage expectations in such an emotionally fraught situation.

femiint said...

emotional blog.. thanks for sharing