Wednesday, June 11, 2008

I'm ready for my prodigious pregnancy now

OK, last day for AF to come. If it doesn't I must forgo my preferred RE and will be resigned to the RE behind door #2. Ah well. At this point I just want to get to trying.

I have to admit I am having the passing thought: What if I'm spontaneously pregnant.? I know...coo coo crazy but it happens...well not to anyone I actually know but I have been told by countless number of casual acquaintances that someone they worked with had a sister's-husbands- cousin- who tried "everything" and then right before their IVF got pregnant. So, of course, that's like proof positive right? I hope not because I'd be pretty sour that I'd loose my $500 deposit on IVF #2.

I'm in no real danger of being disappointed by my lack of an apocryphal pregnancy because I don't really believe that sex can make babies...and even if it could Mr. P has been out of town most of the past month so if I did turn up pregnant I'd have bigger problems than not getting my $500 deposit back.

Truthfully, I'd be sooo embarrassed to get pregnant naturally. I have been tremendously vocal to everyone who'll listen about infertility. Vacations, relaxing, adoption applications, drunkenness will not help. (Drunkenness helps a lot of things alas..infertility is not one of them. If it were I'd have many, many children by now*). I would totally have to lie to people and say we did IVF when we didn't. I think most people do it the other way around...do IVF but not admit it. (BTW...I believe you are under no obligation to tell people how you conceived..Ain't nobody business. Ain't nobody business but me and my Baybeh. I'm so 80's I just may be cool again...No? OK then). As I was saying I would have to lie just to save face.

Which reminds me of the time that my mom said that now that I had a baby everyone knows that I had sex. Actually, mom, no. Piccolina was conceived via iui in the Dr.s office. No sex. I could still be a virgin. I'm not but I could be and THAT my friends would be a prodigious pregnancy.**

*My favorite Simpsons Line: To Alcohol, the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

**Please note that I am not making any comparisons to myself and the blessed Virgin Mary. None at all.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I love this post! How funny we infertiles are...to be embarrassed if we would get pregnant naturally? Hysterical and soooo true. But I bet the embarrassment would be well worth it!!! ;) Great post!