...not throw someone under the bus even when they do it do her: I had a best friend in high school. We were very close. We met at summer camp when we were 12 and spent all our time together. I trusted her with everything. Sure, she flirted with my boyfriends but it was harmless right? Sure she had a bad reputation but she swore up and down she didn't sleep with all those guys and I believed and defended her for years. The year after high school I found out not only was she a slut but she also MADE OUT with MY BOYFRIEND at a party in front of all my friends. I was at that party but I guess I was off somewhere else when it happened (not at-all-drunk or anything). Years later, while I was in college, I saw her and invited her up to my apartment to catch up (letting bygones be bygones). The whole time she shamelessly flirted with my new boyfriend!
It was so pathetic I couldn't even get mad at her. That kind of craziness is something you pity. I can't even be mad because it's so pathetic.
I went to the reunion looking forward to seeing her, hoping she wasn't so crazy anymore and 100% not going to call her out for making out with my high school boyfriend. No axes, just fun!
I walk up to her, tell her who I am and she introduces me to her husband in a loud voice, "And this is Peeveme, who kissed my younger brother." And she was all pissy about it. The kind of pissy where you pretend to be all "ha ha" but it's clear it's been bothering you for a long time. Oh, and my husband was standing right there! The nerve! If anyone has a beef it's me and I was willing to overlook her HUGE betrayal. Plus you don't say stuff like that in front of someone's husband. You just don't. Not cool. That's like a code-red violation of coolness. Not that I'm cool but even I know you don't throw someone under the bus in front of their spouse.
BTW, yes I did kiss her brother. More than once. What? He liked me and he was cute. I guess it bothered her but seriously, brother-kissing vs. making out with best-friend's boyfriend...no contest there.
I could have thrown her right under the bus in front of her husband ....but I did not. How do you accuse someone of making out with your boyfriend without it getting ugly? I know she deserves it but why make something ugly when all I wanted to do was have a good time? Besides, none of it is of any consequence anymore. I have moved on. So, in observance of the rules of cool and operating under my prime directive (have fun) I did not mention her knack for sluttiness or boyfriend-stealing. But I did want to zap her a bit.
So I said, "Oh, I didn't just kiss your brother, we made-out all through high school. In fact, half the time I was over your house I was looking to hook up with him." That's a bit of an exaggeration but it was fun to say. I didn't throw her under the bus but I totally tweaked something that bothered her which made me feel better. Hey, I'm not perfect. I wanted to have fun, not win Miss congeniality. While I am not a cruel person I am mischievous one.